Monday, January 30, 2006

Absolutely Nothing

I've got nothing to say. I have no words. No thoughts to put to paper. I want to have something, but alas, nothing. Maybe something will come tomorrow. A sexy poem or my so called life. Until then.

Friday, January 27, 2006


Hmmmmm…I really have nothing too entertaining to say today, just randomness.

It’s Friday and that’s always nice. The weather is sort of dreary and cold.

Purchased some music on iTunes this week.

The White Stripes - Get Behind Me Satan
Nine Inch Nails - With Teeth
James Blunt - Back to Bedlam

All excellent CDs. I love iTunes and I love my iPod. Just freakin love it.

I have plans to see Lestat in San Francisco this weekend. It’s from the mind of Anne Rice and the music Elton John and Bernie Taupin. So, I ask you, how bad can it be? Regardless, I get out of the house with friends and a bit of escape.

Guess what else I did yesterday…I shaved. Yes, I shaved it all off. I am hair free. Baby smooth. The air flows freely over my sex. In the shower, the water tickles and caresses as it flows over my lips with nothing to dull the sensation. Damn, I’m turning myself on. It feels amazing. I think I’ve said in previous posts that I usually keep the area trimmed, but this is different. I think I need to take a lovahhh.

*artwork Red Canna by Georgia O'Keeffe

Thursday, January 26, 2006

        Don't believe everything you think.

                Tuesday, January 24, 2006


                pleasure and pain

                *Artwork - The Kiss by Rabi Khan

                Monday, January 23, 2006

                My weekend was a whirlwind. Spent Saturday evening in the emergency room. Anyone with children can relate to this experience. Luckily, everything turned out fine. Oh, except for me, the mother, who was so stressed out after the event I wanted to curl up in the fetal position and whimper for a couple of hours.

                On Sunday, I spent a couple of hours with my soon to be ex's family. Haven't been able to cut that tie and I'm not sure I want to. It isn't exactly relaxing spending time with them. They all know what's going on, but we all pretend everything is normal. Stressful that.

                Oh, and it's Monday and I wanted a couple of days off to make up for my less than stellar weekend. Didn't get it. So, here I am whining to you. Forgive me.

                Wednesday, January 18, 2006

                Meet Me

                Meet me. Now. Meet me at the beach, yes, you know the spot. The spot under the pier. Where it’s private and no one can find us. I’m wearing the little black dress, no shoes, toes painted red. Yes, I know you love it. I’ll wear nothing underneath. Please hurry. I’m empty. Bring nothing. Hurry. Hurry. Hurry. Leave your tie in the car. Leave your duties behind. Just simple pleasure. What? No, don’t worry. I'm already waiting. Leave the office now. Right now. Come. To our spot. Fill me up. Take what you need. Now. Now. Now.

                Monday, January 16, 2006

                The Shape of Things to Come

                willingness to help others
                conscious role model
                sense of humor
                career oriented
                knows what he wants

                What is the list you ask?
                Why, it’s my perfect partner list. I could have kept going and going, but I stopped. I realize some are duplicates and some contradict. We are all complicated souls...

                Why, did I write it?
                My therapist recommended I write it down. I wrote this in my blog because this is my journal, my very public journal.

                Did it help?
                Nope, all it did was make me sad. I acknowledge that this list is ever evolving and would have been different a year ago and will most likely be different a year from now, but today it fits. It just fits.

                Friday, January 13, 2006


                brush of lips
                travels down my spine
                kissing me
                slow, slow, slow
                please, harder
                lost to you
                wordless scream
                silent cry
                too much

                Thursday, January 12, 2006

                I have been so busy I can't see straight. What a trip. I know I've said this before, but going to Las Vegas for business is really tough. Working all day and pretending you are on vacation at night just sucks the life out of ya. I did see a couple of cool things this time around. I stayed "Downtown" this time and witnessed CSI taping an episode right in front of the Golden Nugget. They had a dead body on the ground and an actor with it but I don't know who it was, not one of the regulars.

                I also watched, although not in person, the implosion of the old Castway Hotel. It was done early Wednesday morning and I caught it on the news, I could hear and feel the vibration as it happened.

                I have to say that I have yet to win any money in Las Vegas, not only do I not win but I can't even break even. Oh well, I had a blast. I've also noticed that the dealers aren't as friendly as they are in Tahoe or Reno. They all looked bored and half pissed off.

                I do love Las Vegas it just has that seedy edge and potential for debauchery that appeals.

                Sunday, January 08, 2006

                Well, I'm off on another business trip this week. I'm heading back to Las Vegas for three nights. I won't be checking in until I get back. I just wanted to wish everyone a great week.


                Thursday, January 05, 2006


                I've wanted to do this for a while, just haven't found the time. They are not half nekkid even though it's Thursday. I was just in a mood to share. They are self portraits, thus the raised arms. I never realized how hard it is to take self portraits , but it was kind of fun.

                The last picture is for the ass men who read my blog. You know who you are...

                Wednesday, January 04, 2006

                One Who Sees

                I watch you
                You are alone
                You are beautiful
                Such beauty even from a distance
                Your strength, your poise, your presence
                I see this all from afar

                As you undress I fantasize it’s for me and me alone
                Our little game
                My hand slowly moves to my breast

                Your hand is now on your cock
                It moves slowly at first, root to tip
                Up and down, up and down
                Your eyes are closed

                My hand is moving through my folds
                I’m slick from watching you
                The end is near
                I must catch up
                I’m there
                I’m there

                You turn your back
                You walk away

                Tuesday, January 03, 2006

                Love's Secret

                Never seek to tell thy love,
                Love that never told can be;
                For the gentle wind doth move
                Silently, invisibly.

                I told my love,
                I told my love,
                I told her all my heart,
                Trembling, cold, in ghastly fears.
                Ah! she did depart!

                Soon after she was gone from me,
                A traveller came by,
                Silently, invisibly:
                He took her with a sigh.

                Poem and artwork by William Blake

                Sunday, January 01, 2006


                I hope everyone had a wonderful new year's eve. I hope you all toasted the new year in right with friends, family and loved ones.

                My celebration was bittersweet. I look forward to moving forward with my life in 2006, but I realize getting there will be very difficult. It didn't help that I spent part of it with my soon to be ex. Every year we spend it with friends and in our effort to make everything "normal" for the kids this holiday season there I was, uncomfortable and wishing to be anywhere else. Pretending everything is fine in front several people who know you well enough to know it's bullshit is really difficult.

                I plan on starting this year positive with hope and grace. Remind me of this after my next rant....