Saturday, February 25, 2006


I've been a bit depressed. I have certainly been drawn to the darker side of life lately. Even the photo's I've chosen to add to my posts have all been dark. Sometimes I don't even believe it's happening until I look around me and realize that I've been absent. Sort of on a mental break if you will. I keep up all the appearances and the routine of my life so no one's the wiser, but it's all pretend.

I have a good life and I am lucky, this I know. But damn, it can be so difficult sometimes to just be real and stop pretending everything is fine. I specialize in that, you know. I am a rock. Unfortunately, I am a rock buried deep in the soil. It's dark and I am working my way to the surface. I see the light and I know I am close.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006


If you lay down next to me, will you be aware of my anticipation?

If you touch me with light fingertips, will you feel my pounding heartbeat?

If you kiss me deeply, will you taste my craving?

If you cover my eyes with a blindfold, will you see my trepidation?

If you bind my arms and legs, will you understand why I submit?

If you move slowly inside of me, will you allow my release?

If you became a part of my life, will you ever surrender to me?

Friday, February 17, 2006

Baby, it's cold outside

I am back among the living and feeling much better. Thank you all for you kind words while I was under the weather. Speaking of weather, it's fricking freezing here. They say it may snow. SNOW! WTF! Now for most of you this is a way of life in the winter. Not for me. Don't get me wrong. I like the snow when I plan to "visit" it. I live where I do for a reason.

I found this picture and felt it appropriate to place here since I had the shower post before I ended up sick. Besides, I couldn't drag my eyes away from it. Yummy.

Monday, February 13, 2006

Cold Medicine Rocks

I'm sick. I'm home from work and sitting here congested and slightly feverish. I've got a cup of green tea next to my left hand getting cold as I type this post. I think the cold medicine may be effecting my thought process. Clearly, I have nothing interesting to say. Happy Monday.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Little Silver Drain

Water running down my back through my fingers. The water is hot and it burns, burns, burns. It washes all my fear away. Down through the little silver drain on the floor. I watch as it flows. I move my fingers to my mouth and rub them over my lips wetting them with the heated water. I forget myself. I run my fingers over my breasts lightly tracing each tip. The water still pours over my body turning my skin pink. My fingers trail to my mound and my fingers move slowly into the wet that is different from the water pounding around me. The sensation fires through each limb as I watch the water flow down though the little silver drain on the floor.

Thanks to ArtfulDodger for putting me in the mood for a nice hot shower.

Sunday, February 05, 2006


I had an amazing day yesterday. The sun was shining and it was nice enough to spend some time at the beach. This particular beach has a fantastic view of the San Francisco skyline along with the bay bridge. It was soul soothing. The kids were in heaven getting out of the house and running around to their hearts content.

After my little pity party on Friday, which you can tell from my last post, I needed this day at the beach. I feel balanced. Funny how life has a way of doing this when you least expect it.

Friday, February 03, 2006

I'm pretty sure I'm damaged. Not a whole lot damaged just a little bit damaged. Just enough to make sure that I won't allow myself to ever really be happy.

A Lengthy Encounter

This is a story of Big Boy. BB had the largest cock I have ever come upon and this is the story of our encounter.

BB and I were introduced by friends at a club we all frequented. The club was small the music great and the bartenders were lovely to look at. BB was tall and lean. Interesting the things, I remember. Now, we were drinking a lot. I can’t recall what we were drinking but it was flowing pretty steady. We danced. I love to dance, we were sweaty, and it was so hot.

We went back to his place with another couple. We kissed the entire way. Our lips were swollen and red by the time we got there and his stubble had reddened my chin and cheeks and started to sting.

Once there we all had another drink and each had a hit or two of pot. The other couple left us alone and went to another room. We continued to kiss and he stopped to undress. He undressed himself while I watched. Once undressed he looked me in the eye and said, ”Do you like what you see.” At the time, I was sooo inexperienced. Of course, I said, “yes.” I would have said the same thing if the guy was small, but he was not small. He was very long and very thick.

I was incredibly turned on but unfortunately, BB was much more into quantity than quality. He got right to business. Men who are that well endowed have a responsibility to make sure their partners are ready. I was not ready. I did not have nearly enough foreplay for such a big cock. We managed, but not for long. I made him stop. It was too painful so I finished him off with my mouth. He came, I didn’t. This was before I realized I had to take measures into my own hands with some partners or at least carry lubricant. He thanked me and we cuddled a bit. A little later, I got up and went home.

He never called me and I never called him, but I did run into him a week or two later. He asked if he could come home with me. I said, “no.” Not sure if I regret that decision or not.

This was a true story if it wasn't it would have had a much more explosive and satisfying ending. I’m not sure why I decided to write about it. Wait, yes I do...

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

White Walls

White Walls
No noise
Pulse pounding
I chose you
Such craving
Stand above me
On my knees
Guide me
Hands in my hair
Red lips on silken steel
Full to bursting

*artwork-Patience Lost by Chekirov